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Hello fellow earthlings. Now that we have over 45 articles I started mah own reviews. Only doing what you said ESSJ4. These reviews are only my opinion. If you get a bad review I am not trying to be mean. That only means that you have to get better. LEAVE COMMENTS BELOW FOR REQUESTS.

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Life Of A Son

Pros-

  • It is about Broly and Paragus after Planet Vegeta
  • Good grammar and spelling
  • I like the beginning telling about Broly's immense power

Cons-

  • Its kinda weird to keep calling your king King Vegeta. For example, instead of saying 'King Vegeta' over and over again you could say 'My king' or 'Sire'.
  • The short story overview pretty gave the plot away.
  • Start new paragraphs when a person is gonna say something.

Final Comments- Good story with some flaws. Between 6/10 and 7/10

Prison Diary- Prologue

Pros-

  • I like the concept of the story.
  • Good grammar and spelling.
  • Good description.
  • You did a good job saying what they did in pretrial jail.

Cons-

  • Why is everything in italic?
  • HAHA! Now, let me stop being immature, please. I dont know what it is, but I just don't like that sentence.
  • Start a new paragraph when a person is gonna say something.


Final Comments- Very good story. 7/10

Dragon Ball:super duper maity

Pros-

  • Horrible grammar :)
  • Oh no! Maity iss an saiyen hoo used hiss superrr powers to escape planit vageeta.
  • But Maity land on earth with his pett owul Betvet.
  • Captin America having a power level of 73857382758235723jh2385875187!
  • maity turned super saiyan 17.
  • I love the concept of this story.
  • captin amerca went super saiyan 8.
  • maity usd hisspowes and boom captin amecs died.
  • I LOVE THE SENTENCE ABOVE THIS ONE.
  • No friking capitalization...
  • maity so exsited he turn EVEL!!!DEN DAY CLOMED.
  • My favorite section was FUSIN SAVES DAY.
  • He tried to kill buu 60328413854238758237582758 times in 1 minute.
  • Recome.
  • Cell.
  • Ginyu Force.
  • Dr. Gero.
  • Cooler looks like a hybrid of Cooler and King Cold.
  • Dabura.
  • Majin Maity.

Cons-

  • I would have really liked to know what was going on.

Final Comments- This was... beautiful! A masterpiece. Best comedy story i have eva read besides DBKC. 10/10.

Kuzon the 3rd legendary super saiyan

Pros-

  • TitaniumBardock deleted it.

​Cons-

  • The grammar is bad.
  • The spelling is kinda bad.
  • The Legendary Super Saiyan is supposed to appear every 1000 years.
  • Kuzon- That name- What is it a pun off of?
  • The chapter names are TOO DAMN LONG.
  • The Snake Saga was the worst saga of them all.
  • Seriously? The villain is a snake?
  • All the saga names are lame.

Final Comments- Not to be mean or anything, but this sucked. 2/10

Pokemon Last Stance

Pros-

  • You started a new paragraph when someone talked! Thats an accomplishment.
  • Decent grammar.

Cons-

  • Horrible spelling.
  • I don't get the concept of this story.
  • Does it even have a story concept?
  • The plot is this: Death defeats Ash's Pokemon so Ash keeps using more Pokemon to try to beat him.
  • "You Monster"sreamed Ash. That is an example of a bad sentence. No emotion, you spelt 'screamed' wrong.
  • I hate Pokemon. (This won't affect your score.

Final Comments- Well, at least this is better than your Dragon Ball fan-fictions, cuz they sucked. 3/10

Prison Diary- A Cell Is Not A Home

Pros-

  • I love how you explain how HORRIBLE it is in prison.
  • Great spelling.
  • Good grammar.
  • I love the idea of this story.
  • Leah is the name of my 4 year old cousin. :)

Cons-

  • START NEW PARAGRAPHS WHEN YOU TALK.
  • Did you finish it or not?

Final Comments- Better than your first one, I liked it alot. 8/10

Earth-415

Pros-

  • I love Marvel.
  • I also love all the events in the five year gap for Spider Man Unleashed.
  • You included lots of Marvel Superheroes.
  • I like the gallery.
  • Love the concept. Very cool.
  • My favorite one is Spider Man Unleashed.

Cons-

  • Unfinished.

​Final Comments- I like this alot. The idea of this is very good and cool and solid. Very nice. 8.5/10

Spider Man (Earth-415)

Pros-

  • It explains lots about Peter Parker's life.
  • Lots of detail.
  • VERY descriptive.

Cons-

  • UNFINISHED.

Final Comments- Another one of ExtremeSSJ4's good pages that I liked. Well done. 8.5/10

Spidey's Harem

Pros-

  • Spider-man gets a unknown chemical causing him to attract multiple women from the marvel universe, will he conquer this latest task or be smothered by various females.
  • EVERYBODY KEEPS HAVING SEX WITH PETER.
  • You turned Spider-Man into a character for adults.
  • You REALLY described the sex scenes.

Cons-

  • EVERYBODY KEEPS HAVING SEX WITH PETER.
  • Too much sex man.
  • Lesbians.
  • Three-somes
  • Four-play.
  • FIVE PEOPLE.
  • Explain more about the chemical.
  • "Agh, it burns, CRAP IT BURNS. HELP, AHH. FUCK THIS BURNS"

Final Comments- Not as good as ESSJ4's other stories. 6/10

Spider-Girl: Rise Of A Hero (Volume 1)

Pros-

  • Very descriptive.
  • I love the fight scene between Jack and Gene in the beginning.
  • I also love the part where Gene opens the locker and the Granny Panties pile out onto his face.
  • Very good grammar.
  • Very good spelling.
  • "OH MY GOOD...IT BURNS!"
  • You...You...You shmuck!
  • Flash got married to Felicia and had a two kids named Gene and Felicity, but then Flash and Felicia divorced.

Cons-

  • Jack's dad dying is kinda cliche.
  • Jack becoming a Super Hero is also cliche.

Final Comments- I enjoyed reading this. Keep it up SSJ3A. 8.8/10


The Son of Neptune

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